sometimes i'm not sure what I think of this whole pregnancy thing...
it still kinda weirds me out that there is a BABY INSIDE ME!
ill just be sitting around working on the computer or something and all the sudden it will
hit me all over again
and ill get all big eyed and think im gonna be a momma!
i have lots of fears about this whole having a baby thing....
I worry about it being healthy...
I worry about it's little organs being strong and active...
I worry about all the chromosomes being perfect...
i worry about being a good mom
and knowing what to say at all the right moments.
....
and then i have my irrational fears as well...
I WORRY ABOUT HAVING AN UGLY CHILD!!!
i mean come on look at these morphs i did of me and eric
and then i don't think that my fear is that irrational lol...
baby gillies (no gender selected)
baby girl gillies
and i saved the worst for last...
baby boy gillies
in fifth grade i was made fun of horribly because of my awkward looks and personality
my freckles were laughed at...
i was called gopher cause of my buck teeth...
i was really lanky and skinny and accused of being anorexic...
i had NO idea how to even begin to deal with my thin crazy hair....
i was a strange one... and ill admit that i still am lol
....i just pray my child doesn't have to deal with being made fun of....
but then i look at all my precious little nieces and nephews
each one with their amazing personalities
and special features that make them so handsome or beautiful.
the innocence that shows in their eyes
and the sweet smile that brightens up their face.
i sure love each one of them more then i could ever describe.
:)
im sure it's still possible...
but how can i have an ugly child
when it's cousins are SOOO flipping CUTE!!!
RiGhT!?!
lets hope anyways...
at least that's what will get me through till i
actually get to see my baby
lol
ALSO!
we FINALLY find out what we are having
on APRIL 30!!!
what a great birthday present right!
(please just pray for me that it's not shy or have it's legs crossed!)
i really don't care if it's a boy or a girl
either one i imagine i just get so overwhelmingly excited.
but... eric wants.... (and thinks he NEEDS) a boy.
so we will see what happens.
last week i felt it for the first time.
it's so weird feeling that little fluttering feeling going on in your belly
but i LOVE it.
i feel it a couple of times a day
it makes me happy
:) :) :)
...honestly...
i think i probably really hype it a lot and
get it going from my (i really TRY to make it just one) pop.
i really should lay off the caffeine
but i CRAVE my morning coke!
and lets be honest i will ALWAYS give into my cravings.
i have absolutely no self control.
and i'm actually perfectly fine with that.
just a thought...
i'm being serious i really want your prayers on the 30th
my luck we won't get to find out it's gender.
ALSO!
just for additional luck i wouldn't kill ya if you prayed that
ill have a cute baby :P
.
.
.
just kiddin
;)
